how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Randomize
