I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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