New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
