3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
