i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
The convent might be a nice break from real life
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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