So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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