the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
