well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
