How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
