I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
