dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
