go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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