3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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