I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
