i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
