I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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