Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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