so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
