Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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