But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Randomize