so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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