I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize
