I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
