By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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