The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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