you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
