Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
