Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
