You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
