the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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