what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
nutella sex= disaster
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
