I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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