ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
You left your phone here
Wait...
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