i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
