OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
