i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Randomize
