Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Sorry about my life...
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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