Your face is a jimmy john
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
