I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
