okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
