well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
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