The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
