I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
