Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
