Don't make out with my wife yet
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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