Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I am one with the molecules
Randomize
