Sponge bath it is.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
