I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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