alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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