Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
